“Love”.

A very common word we hear almost everyday, and think of it to be experienced by almost everyone we know. But can it be defined as real and true? Is the love we know of, have experienced, or seen, truly for real? Is it like the love that Romeo-Juliet had, which led to Shakespeare penning down the most popular of love tragedies ever written in history? Perhaps yes. Or maybe not. In todays’ world, love is a heavily debated topic. People often try to define love in terms of romantic euphoria; however, the word ‘love’ is generally used in such a loose way that its essence has thus become diluted.

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With so many mixed feelings the heart showcases with the release of love hormones, it is difficult to differentiate whether it is attraction or are you just crushing on someone. Whether you have a crush on someone, or are just infatuated with him/her, or it is just a phase of attraction, is really hard to understand till you try to investigate and understand it wholly.

What is “Love” in the real sense?

The ancient Chinese philosopher, Lao Tzu quoted, “Love is of all passions the strongest, for it attacks simultaneously the head, the heart, and the senses.” His quote stands true if we were to define love in the simplest of ways, and understand its depth. Perhaps it is also true that being deeply loved by someone will give you strength; while loving someone deeply will give you courage. And so, when two individuals are deeply loved and in love, by/with each other, they come out stronger, courageous and happier in life. But that does not alone define the true meaning of love, or help us know the actual essence of being in a relationship of love, that is real and true.

The Idea of being in “Love”

Do you feel that you are truly, deeply, and madly in love with your partner? Love can take up different forms, and everyone might be experiencing love in their own way, thus letting us understand the meaning of true love all the more complicated. Owing to today’s fragile relationships, we often wonder whether we are truly in love with our partner and whether he/she is going to be our soulmate. We keep awake thinking what our destiny holds for us and how would we know whether we are not the one who has mistaken lust, attraction, infatuation or even affection, for real love that could last a lifetime. At most times, we think differently from what our heart desires, and vice versa, and herein lies the basis of all the confusion and the answer to our dilemmas as well.

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The problem is that we often confuse love with passion. We are even experts at confusing our sense of passion with feelings of love. We follow the notion that when we are in a romantic relationship and are blindly in love with each other, we would be deeply entwined with each other at all times. Mistaking lust or even attraction for love is not something rarely done, and could often be committed by the smartest amongst us.

It is also common to not be able to know the difference between love and attraction, or whether it is love or infatuation that your are experiencing. We perhaps find it difficult to know the difference if our heart is beating for an infatuation or a love that is short-lived or for a short-phased attraction.

The ‘Love’ that we know

When you are actually falling in love or are in love, it is a totally different level of attraction. It involves an emotional connection felt by both the partners. As explained by the Merriam Webster dictionary, “Love is a strong affection for another, arising out of kinship or personal ties”. It further gives the meaning of affection as, “A feeling of liking and caring for someone or something; a tender attachment”. And contrary to what most of us believe, that lust can eventually make you fall in love, it isn’t true. Lust will always overpower, i.e., two people attracted by lust will always give more importance to sexual desires, more than anything else. In fact, more often than not, the ‘love’ at first sight does not happen. It is either mostly attraction, lust or infatuation.

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Love is being ‘grounded’, not flying at all times

Thus, drop down those beliefs that butterflies in your stomach when you see someone, or the intense attraction at the first meeting of your eyes with someone, etc., necessarily means ‘true love’ every time. Though it could denote true love, yet one could have such intense feelings even when not truly in love. Love has its own forms, and to surpass them all, and fall in true love for real, you would need to have a balance of attraction, lust, affection, friendship, fulfillment, and the feeling of togetherness.

When not in love, it is easier to not think of loyalty or falling prey to excitement and getting attracted to others while already being in a relationship with someone.

For being aware, Vedic Astrology has a guidebook for you to abide by as per the moon sign, so that you get help in knowing beforehand how your partner could turn out to be. Read here for more.

It is not easy to figure out what your exact feelings are for a person. Whether it is love or just an infatuation? Or, maybe you are just attracted to them physically. Though we assume love to be a feeling that is easy to identify, yet, when we try we realize that it is not easy. And when your head starts debating what your heart is feeling, and they both don’t agree on similar things, that is when you know that the idea of love has been skewed.

Signs that you are in love

Now that you already are in a dilemma and understand that it is really necessary to know what you actually feel, read on to know how and what telling signs will help you find out the truth!

So if you are feeling confused over what you are feeling, and wondering if it’s love, lust or infatuation, just use these small anecdotes by me, to help understand yourself and your heart and mind better!

• Is it infatuation?

Infatuation can sometimes tricky you real bad into believing that you are in love. Most of the times it would be in our younger years, or maybe our first experiences with a partner. There is a burst of happiness that comes along with an adrenaline rush that runs through your entire body, and makes you beam with excitement. These feelings could intact be so intense, that they make you believe that you are in love; only to make you realize t[later that those feelings have faded away and you are left in a mess. Infatuation can be described as a short lived admiration or passion for someone, which would melt away in due time. In order to tell the difference here, you would have to distinguish your feelings and deeply think about their essence and till how long can you just admire someone on the basis of those feelings?

• Is it attraction?

When we talk of attraction, you might be thinking that it must be the same as infatuation. However, they are not. ‘Infatuation’ is a phase of excitement, whereas attraction can be backed by hormones as well. There might be a dozen things that attract you to a person, and at times, even while meeting for the first time, you could feel an attraction so intense, that you might believe it to be love at first sight. Though I am not saying that love at first sight does not exist at all, yet, it would be truer to say that it is a feeling of intense attraction. Such a feeling could also escalate to real love, but knowing someone above just their physical appearance, would be necessary to discover if you have really fallen in love with them.

Since attraction can lead to love in the long run, if it proves to be constant, you can very well find out how compatible you would be with your partner if you fall in love. For more in-depth reading, we suggest you to check for yourself here.

• Is it lust?

When it is all lust in you, the primary motivation factor that would be there which attracts you to your partner, would definitely be physical and sexual desires. This would mean that everything you do – purposely or without thought, be it all the sweet nothings and the romantic gestures; will ultimately lead you both to the bedroom for sex. You would give huge importance to looking good at all costs, because physical beauty would be of huge importance to you for sticking around. True love is different. People in love would even love spending the most boring of times, however mundane they might sound for others, with the one they love.

How does it really feel like when you love someone for real? And, is it possible to know whether you are really in love with your partner, or are just attracted to them? Is it only a phase of infatuation or do you only have lustful desires for him? These questions might be boggling your head since you are here reading this article now. To make it easier for you, and help letting you stop wandering, the following are signs that you are probably in a real love relationship.

• You have your partner in your mind at almost all times.

It is not like that you would be obsessed or thinking about him/her 24*7, but it would be safe to say that you would be addicted to them. You would have them at the back of your mind, while doing the busiest of things or even the minutest of things. It would also mean that when you are out and about, things you see or hear will remind you of your partner.

• Your partner’s mood would affect you directly.

When you are in love, you would be glad and contended if you saw your partner in a good mood and being happy. If they were in a bad mood or were sad, it would obviously affect you, and you would try to lift up their mood and try everything possible to make them feel better.

• You would love spending time together, however short and no matter where.

When you are in love, it would not just be that ‘late night party’, ‘fine dining date’, or ‘weekend getaway to the countryside’, that might attract you. Being in love means enjoying even the shortest of times together and getting excited about binge watching your favorite series while gobbling on popcorn and freshly delivered pizza. You would never feel that the time spend together was being wasted, and every minute together, even while doing nothing, would count.

• Your partner would always motivate you to be your best self and encourage you in all of your endeavors, and vice versa.

When you are seriously in love, you tend to see the zeal, talent, caliber, and aptitude in your partner, and always be in constant appreciation for them and strive them to believe that they can do better.

You would show interest in the things they care about or are passionate in, and sometimes even try them out.

When in love, you would love to know what things interest your partner, and understand why they are passionate about it. You would try to actively be a part of their lives, and try to understand their interests, passions, and hobbies.

• You discuss things openly and listen to each other, and also compromise when it is necessary.

When you are in love, you would always try to sit down and discuss the cause of your arguments and misunderstandings, rather than shouting at each other and trying to find faults. After the heat of moment passes, you would share opinions and then try to solve your conflicts so that they do not bring distances among you.

• You like to learn new things together, and enjoy a lot of experiences.

When you are in real love relationship, you would nit just want to be together in bed, or go dining at the new restaurant around the corner. You would be eager to do real things of importance and make memories, and be a part of life’s bigger experiences. You would plan new things to learn together or experience something new for the first time together, and just be there for each other and enjoy your time together.

Being in love is a pleasant feeling. If you believe that you are in love for real and want to take the next step of commitment with your partner, read this article to help you with Vedic Astrology suggestions.

Now that you have gone through the points that trace towards love, what do you think of it? Is it love that is between you and your partner? Have you really fallen in love? The kind that feels truly real and only yours? Questions are many, and you have to find answers to them only by yourself. Because, at the end of the day, it is only you who knows what you are feeling.